Thursday, September 30, 2010

End of Summer.....

The wild turkeys gather in the backyard, huddled together, as if they know something about the upcoming winter that I don't. The autumn leaves are quickly replacing summers last green and the lone patio chair placed in it's silent stance till spring comes round again.

My waiting room fills with young voices all seeking a way to live in this world. Homesickness fills the corners of my office as we plot our course together of letting go....we let go of beliefs held since childhood, summer flings and summer loves, a misperception here and there. Teacher and student.... roles reversed, on any given day. Take me on your journey....learn to live on your own.
On her unit, the days grow shorter and darkness hovers at the edges. There are dark holes in the floor where the carpets used to be. So many empty spaces and beds. The red chairs that signify "Hospice" is in the house. There are fewer smiles, fewer words and thoughts, less attention given to the present. Where do you go for longer and longer periods of time? There is a place where I cannot go with you. I sit vigil, waiting for a glimpse of your return. Our last best day of summer, I walked you outside. The Rose of Sharon was in full bloom and you said it was beautiful. We held hands, I always trying to hold onto more of you than I can find. The blooms are long since faded, having dropped to the ground, color and life retreating. I too work hard to let you go.

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