I had a girls weekend away this past week. Our excuse was a Christmas shopping and cheer filled two days. Always for me, it is about time spent in good company....good female company. Hey, what can I say..I'm an only child without a large extended family. It's the slumber party I never had. We are all daughters, and all but myself are mothers. One has already lost her mom to Alzheimer's, another lost her mom just a few months ago to cancer and the other two describe their living moms as feisty, strong, sometimes impossible, but always a clear presence in their lives.
Stories were shared about family traditions and Christmases past. A gaudy, festively decorated sweater was considered for one mom, but eventually good taste won out and it was left on the rack. I found myself not talking a whole lot about my mom. What to say? The story really doesn't change from one day to the next. I saw items in the stores, decorations in the windows and gaily festooned hats that my mother would have loved. In another time and day, we would have donned those hats and laughed ourselves silly. I think a lot about Christmas past and what it meant to be part of my family. We would gather on Christmas Eve, just the three of us, around the tree at midnight. Wishes to each other were shared and thanks were given that we were together. Morning would bring the traditional chicken pie breakfast, a full stocking and more thanks for all that we received.
I stopped to visit my mother on my way home from the weekend. I announce myself as her daughter Pam. She smiles, reaches for my hand and wants to know if I've seen her mother. We sit side by side for the next hour, holding hands in peaceful silence.....each of us a daughter, each of us looking for our mom.